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HUMOR IN RAILROAD

East Indian Railway was started to operate in 1854. But 55 years after its maiden run, Trains did not have toilets in them, at least third class coaches did not have. Otherwise way back in 1909, aggrieved Babu Okhil Ch. Sen would not have written this complaint. The letter, discovered in railway records in Sahibgunj, West Bengal.written to the white transportation superintendent, dated July 2, 1909 , is reproduced in full.

"Dear Sir,

I am arrive by passenger train at Ahmedpore station, and my belly is too much full of jack fruit. I am therefore went to privy, Just as I doing the nuisance, that guard making whistle blow for train to go off and I am running with lotah in one hand and dhotie in the next hand. I am fall over and expose my shockings to man, females, woman on platform. I am get leaved at Ahmedpore station.

This too much bad, if passenger go to make dung, that dam guard no wait train 5 minutes for him. I am therefore pray your honour to make big fine on that guard for public sake, otherwise I am making big report to papers.

your faithful servant

sd./ Okhil Ch. Sen

The text of this letter has been published in the August 1909 issue of the Railway board's Journal "Indian Railways."

I do not know whether any DPG was appointed to deal with these case in those days, but rest assured even today we receive letters similar in spirit and language from passengers making similar complaints. Yes both in English and mother tongue.

Here are a few extracts of humour in rail collected from "Eastern Railway Magzine" 1953 for the visitors of this page. The reason for reproduction is that these are pretty old but not in circulation right now. You may like it.

WHOSE PROPERTY  ?                              bigeye.gif (16311 bytes)

There is a story of the angry passenger who complained to a railway official that he had a cinder in his eye from one of the engines, and it cost him one pound to have it taken and have his eye seen by a doctor.

The aggrieved passenger asked : " What are you going to do about it ?"

To this the official answered tactfully , after saying that he was sorry to learn of the occurrence, "We shall do nothing, Sir! " - " We have no further use of the cinder, and from a legal point of view the cinder was not yours. No doubt we could institute proceedings against you for removing our property, but in this case we shall take no further steps in the matter"

The Train Stopped on Red                                signal.gif (2177 bytes)

This is a most frequent query " Why has the train stopped ?" whenever a passenger train stopped out of course, and railwaymen go to some pains to tell passengers the correct reason for the delay. There was a case however during the War when a passenger train came to a stop near a junction to allow a war freight to pass through ahead of it and the guard of the passenger train, who had sworn to secrecy about the traffic movement said

" We have stopped because signalman up the line has red hair and the engine driver can not drive past him until he pulls his head in." He was needless to say not believed by the passengers.

The Old Woman of and the Driver 
This story has been in circulation in Eastern part of India for a pretty long time. The BDR(Bankura Damodar light railways was infamous for its slow running. It is told that the drivers used to stop trains midway to pick up passengers from villages. One such drivers had a regular passenger , an old woman who used to carry her produce of vegetables to a nearby town daily. being old she could never reach the station in time and the driver used to pick her up enroute almost daily. But then the train used to be slow as ever. 

One day the driver found the old woman walking along the tracks with bundle of produce over her head. With the intention to help her the driver slowed down the train and asked " Hello, aunty ! Come on in ."

The Aunty with her toothless smile replied " My good son ! I am in a little hurry today. Let me go on foot."  

 

Please send your collection of Rail-Jokes or funny stories which you might have come across for others to enjoy.

 

 

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